Toilet Gaming

We all have done it at one time or another, your sitting on the toilet at home or at work doing a number two and you know your gonna be there a while. So you do the only thing you can do to make the time you spend in there less boring. (Yes I said doing a poop is boring, it just doesn't entertain me, and don't deny doing it) So you whip out your Phone,DS, PSP or other gaming device and play, often staying sat there playing away with your pants round your ankles longer than you need to.

So just what are some great games you can pick up and play for a quick 15-45 minute go, while locked in the bathroom? Well here are some of my favourite games to play....

Well my phone is a piece of crap, I am not one of these people that has to have the latest I-phone or Blackberry. I have a Razor phone that looked good about 2-3 years ago. Since I got a free game with my contract every month I have played some average and some great games on it. The ideal game to play is a simple puzzle game like Jewel Quest or the superior Jewel Quest 2.


The game play is simple you just line up 3 jewels to clear a line and light the tiles behind them. If you however line up 3 skulls they wipe out any tiles that are lit up where they were before you cleared them. I used to play this game all the time at work and it doesn't seem to get old, it's an addictive game to say the least and perfect to play on any phone. (Something that can't be said for 99% of phone games)


The DS is a great piece of kit, I only own the original one because I didn't feel that upgrading to a DS Lite was really worth it. I have to say that the number of games available is fantastic with the ability to play GBA games as well Nintendo gave everyone what they love, a backward compatible system. Personally I love to play RPG's on the DS, they are perfect toilet games as you can either continue the story, or just sit there and level up your characters by getting in some random encounters just so you can beat that boss a bit easier further along in the game.


This may look like a surprising choice but so far this game is everything you would expect to see in a Naruto RPG. Why would I play a Naruto game I hear you ask, well my kid has managed to brainwash me by forcing to watch Naruto with him for the last year or so. As a result I am now turning into a fan of all things Naruto. Path of the Ninja 2 see's some evil Ninja's releasing some evil spirits from a cave, and you must get 5 magical mirrors to seal the cave before the large demon escapes. Basically its an old school RPG like you would see on the Snes years ago, with the touch screen coming into play to do your chakra moves. (Basically special moves a bit like using magic in another RPG) The party system see's you being able to use a host of Naruto characters as you go about your mission, in this turn based RPG. (One to import if your in the UK as it still hasn't been released over here yet)

I no longer own a PSP, I still own about 25-30 games for the system though just incase I end up buying a new one in the future. I doubt that it will be any time soon though, as the PSP while being able to do a lot of things always felt a bit lack luster to me, and really uncomfortable to play on for more than about an hour.

Everybodys Golf features characters with oversized heads and a whole host of courses to play through. As well as this you have loads of items to unlock and purchase to improve your golfer, from better clubs to some new snazzy pants. The game just reminds me of Tee-Off on the Dreamcast, which was one of the most enjoyable golf games I have played to date. While Everybody's Golf doesn't improve on Tee-Off it is definitely on par with it. (Sorry I couldn't resist the bad golf pun, I guess I can't hit a hole in one all the time.) As each course takes around 3-4 minutes to play the game is perfect for a quick 9 holes while your otherwise engaged.

Now I know not many people have a Neo Geo Pocket Colour, but the few that have will no doubt have heard of this game and its SNK version counterpart. The Neo Geo Pocket was far superior to the Gameboy and Game Gear, the only things that really let it down was that nobody can compete with Nintendo when it comes to hand held's, and they had very poor third party support and as well all know without games your system sucks.

SNK Vs Capcom Card fighters Clash was released in two different versions, A Capcom version and SNK version. I managed to get both with my Pocket Colour, and there is very little difference between the 2 apart from the cards used in each version. The game sees you walking around and challenging people to fights using cards, kind of like Yu-Gi-Oh except less gay. The game basically sees you going around and getting more powerful cards, as you try and work out what your best strategy is with the cards you have. It's not the most thrilling game in the world, but that is why it is perfect for those lonely gaming sessions that include just you and your porcelain throne.

All four of the games are great in their own right, and are worth playing while not using the toilet. To those people still saying "ewwww" at the thought of using a system on the toilet, stop using your phone on the toilet or reading in there, it's just as disgusting.